If you had told one of my teachers when I was in high school that I would grow up to teach business courses, write a leadership book, and spend a good part of my life developing leaders, they probably would have had a few questions.
I almost didn't graduate from high school. I didn't finish a book cover to cover during those years. School wasn't exactly where I was setting the world on fire.
Now, I share that because I don't want you to make the mistake of thinking where you are today determines what you're capable of becoming. It doesn't. I am not a natural-born leader. I've had to learn, practice, make mistakes, read a ridiculous number of books, and keep learning.
But I've also discovered that some abilities kept showing up in my life long before I recognized them as strengths.
Your first opportunity may not look important
One of my first leadership experiences came when my wife and I volunteered with the youth group at our church. We were nineteen and newly married. We wanted to help young people avoid some of the mistakes we had made.
Sounds pretty noble, doesn't it? Well, our first big assignment was cleaning up after the kids ate chips and queso.
We weren't put in charge of developing a vision or speaking to a crowd. We cleaned up dishes.
But we showed up. We served. Eventually we were asked to teach, and later we took on greater responsibilities. I didn't know at nineteen where that would lead. I did know that we wanted to help people.
Looking back, I can see some strengths beginning to take shape: communicating, encouraging, teaching, and helping others grow. The responsibility grew as those abilities were developed.
That's something I want you to notice in your own life. Your strengths may be showing up in ordinary places long before somebody hands you a title.
What do people keep asking you to do?
When I work with people on purpose, we talk about core competencies. That's a business term for the things you do well and can consistently use to produce value. You may have a gift for making complicated ideas simple. You may be able to organize a confusing situation, build relationships, solve technical problems, or notice when somebody is struggling.
Some skills come naturally. Others develop through years of work. Usually, it's a combination of both.
Here's what I find interesting: sometimes the thing you do best is so easy for you that you assume everybody else can do it. They can't. That's why they keep asking for your help.
Ask yourself these questions:
What problems do people naturally bring to me?
When have I helped somebody and thought, "That wasn't very difficult"?
What kinds of responsibilities have people trusted me with again and again?
Where have I produced results, not just received compliments?
I want you to look for evidence. "I'm great with people" is a nice thing to say, but what does it mean? Do people come to you when they need to work through a disagreement? Have you been able to build relationships across groups that normally don't work well together? Give yourself something specific you can recognize and develop.
The same goes for your weaknesses. An early struggle is information, not a life sentence. If I had decided that my experience in high school meant I wasn't capable of learning or teaching, I would have missed opportunities that have brought me a great deal of meaning.
Somebody else can help you see it
I've learned the value of having people speak into my life. Mentors and people close to me saw potential I wasn't fully recognizing.
So I'd like you to ask three people who know you in different settings one question: "When have you seen me at my best, and what was I doing?"
Don't let them get away with simply telling you that you're nice or hardworking. Ask for a story. What did you do? How did it help? What was different because you were involved?
Then ask a second, forward-looking question: "What is one thing I could do that would make that strength more useful to people?"
That's important. I'm not trying to help you collect compliments. I want you to recognize a strength and grow it. Maybe you're a good teacher, but you need to listen more. Maybe you're great at solving problems, but you need to stop jumping in so quickly that other people never learn to solve them.
Scripture teaches that we should use our gifts to serve others (1 Peter 4:10). I love the connection between ability and service. The question isn't only, "What am I good at?" It's, "How can I use this to add value to somebody else's life?"
This week, identify one strength, ask somebody for a real example of it, and use it intentionally to help another person. Pay attention to the result. Then do it again.
We all have room to grow. But you don't have to wait until you're good at everything to start doing something worthwhile with what you've already been given.
If you want to put this into practice, my free Strategic Life Plan will walk you through it. If you're new here, you can read why I do this work.
Best regards,
Drew
